Safety first

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Safety first

Postby motoman » Fri Dec 11, 2009 10:58 am

From reading the recent posts, I have reconsidered my plans for opening my first coffee shop. My ideal location is now the shack between the fire station and the River Severn. In the event of fire, drop down Co2 masks above each seat will deploy, all the oxygen will be sucked from the building and the sluice gates will open to flush out the debris.

The dilema of which colour towels used to wipe out the p/f is solved by using coffee coloured asbestos material. As a safety backup, flame throwers will purge the equipment of all germs (including swine flu). A team of medics from the hospital at the rear of the shop will be on standby in case of emergency.

In the interest of public safety, all frothing wands will be removed and only espresso served. Customers will be allowed to bring in their own hot milk as long as they observe the, no outside food to be consumed in shop rule.
All customers entering the shop will be required to walk through the foot bath to eliminate all diseases, including anthrax, foot and mouth and chicked flu. The anti nit spray is quite subtle and will be hardly noticed.

Staff hygene is paramount and all tongs, spoons and other utensils will be dipped in DDT before and after each use. I have been advised that the large jar of dead cockroaches should not be on display although I still think it proves that we care about cleanliness.

We look forward to your custom.
La Valentina Levetta
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RE: Safety first

Postby CakeBoy » Fri Dec 11, 2009 12:20 pm

I'll have whatever he is drinking! :P Btw, do you have parking avalable? :D
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RE: Safety first

Postby darrensandford » Fri Dec 11, 2009 1:03 pm

You could coat the 'roaches in chocolate and serve 'em with the espresso!

Crunchy on the outside, soft on the inside! Roaches! :D
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Re: Safety first

Postby GreenBean » Fri Dec 11, 2009 1:06 pm

motoman wrote:We look forward to your custom.


Not mine I'm afraid. I would much rather have the bacteria, viruses, bugs and dirt than the chemicals. All I ask for is basic hygiene and the use of soap and water. Why is that so hard to find? :) :cry:
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RE: Re: Safety first

Postby leecb » Fri Dec 11, 2009 1:47 pm

Not mine I'm afraid. I would much rather have the bacteria, viruses, bugs and dirt than the chemicals. All I ask for is basic hygiene and the use of soap and water. Why is that so hard to find?


Hear hear!!
This week I are mainly ready to get back to making muffins!"

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RE: Re: Safety first

Postby motoman » Sat Dec 12, 2009 2:26 pm

I'm all for freedom of choice. Would you like them in one container or packaged separately?
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Re: RE: Re: Safety first

Postby GreenBean » Sun Dec 13, 2009 10:14 am

GreenBean wrote:
motoman wrote:We look forward to your custom.

Not mine I'm afraid. I would much rather have the bacteria, viruses, bugs and dirt than the chemicals. All I ask for is basic hygiene and the use of soap and water. Why is that so hard to find? :) :cry:

motoman wrote:I'm all for freedom of choice. Would you like them in one container or packaged separately?

As I mentioned in another thread I would prefer the bacteria, viruses, bugs and dirt served on a side plate. This would allow the proprietors and staff that insist that they are providing a public service, by giving their customers the recommended daily allowance of these substances, to continue to offer this service whilst allowing the customers the option to pass on these extras and just consume the food and drink they asked for. :roll: :wink:
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RE: Re: RE: Re: Safety first

Postby bruceb » Sun Dec 13, 2009 11:12 am

In my opinion we may be flogging a dead horse here. With the exception of the experience I had in Frankfurt last week I believe cleanliness has never been an issue in the restaurants and cafés that I have visited. The German health authorities are on their toes and act quickly and decisively if they find someone following poor hygiene practices. What bothers me much more is the sh*t I get served in the cup. It may be sterile for all I know, but it tastes like rubbish, made by indifferent servers from terrible coffee. I'd gladly trade a bacterium or two for that trash.
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Postby GreenBean » Sun Dec 13, 2009 12:54 pm

Yes I have to agree. The next time I see a dead horse I will try harder to resist the urge.

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Postby bruceb » Sun Dec 13, 2009 1:00 pm

:lol: :lol:
Three Francesconi (CMA) espresso machines - Rossi, San Marco, LaCimbali, Faema and 2 Mazzer Major grinders- CoffeeTech Maggionlino, Hottop, Alpenröst and HW Precision roasters.
I decided I needed a bit of a change so I roasted some Monsooned Malabar. That was a change!
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Postby CakeBoy » Sun Dec 13, 2009 10:52 pm

GreenBean wrote:Yes I have to agree. The next time I see a dead horse I will try harder to resist the urge.

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That looks so rude, but so right somehow ....... :roll: :P
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