Too Much Coffee

A hazlenut in every bite?

CakeBoy wrote:A hazlenut in every bite?

Mark ? is the answer ......... Squirrel Poo?

We serve coffee made to order on the clover. There is a menu in the bar with the selection.

Man: I only want some coffee. (As in "I think espresso is for snobs")
Me: Sure! Which coffee would you like?
Man: Just normal coffee.
Me: No problem. You can choose which one from this menu. (Pointing at the menu in the bar.)
Man: No. I just want normal Norwegian coffee.
Me: We have coffee from many places in the world like Kenyan coffee, Guatemalan coffee, Ethiopian coffee and so on but no coffee from Norway. There isn't such a thing as Norwegian coffee.
Man: (Looks at the menu.)
Me: Would you like a suggestion perhaps?
Man: Yes please! (relieved)

Result: Man gets a fruity Kenyan coffee and is totally amazed over how it tastes. He smiles and says it's the best coffee he's had.


Ola

That's satisfying

Have you guys ever thought how the customer is feeling.

he/she wants a nice coffee, up till now there only experience of coffee is a cup of black liquid that you add milk or cream to .. they probably make it at home with a French press or a filter machine ... its a coffee.

They then go shopping and see a coffee shop, go in and look at the menu

Latte
Cappuccino
Machiato
espresso
espresso con pana
Frappicino
FappaCappaMachalattepresso
FappaCappaMachalattepresso con pana


I can feel the despair already building up in the customer "FFS !!! All I want is a fcuking cup of coffee"

It would be a bit like you guys going to burgur van. asking for a bacon sandwich and being told

do you want a Brucheta Pancetta, a Parma rullo con pomadoro, prosciuto su integralle

and the menu behind the guy is the same .....I think I woul be inclined to say "do you do normal bacon sandwiches"

I understand that completely , but there is a polite way off doing it and an arogant way , after asking the 200th person what kinda coffee they want my patience starts to disappear when people refuse to even try and make a discision for them selves .
When in doubt ask and you'll find most passionate professional barista's are more than willing to help you decide which is best for you .

We want you to enjoy your coffee just as much as you want to enjoy it.

Would you walk into a car sales yard and ask to buy "just a normal car" ?
"i want a normal holiday , just to any where "?

BazBean wrote:

CakeBoy wrote:A hazlenut in every bite?

Mark ? is the answer ......... Squirrel Poo?

Yup and a right Curly-Wurly one too . Actually, I prefer eating Mars Bar myself

classic one today! posh lady walks in just after i've repaired espresso machine, "i'd like an americano with hot milk". i just chuckled to myself....

Sometimes I get costomers who are really amazed about the rozetta I poured them. Once I got 2 gay guys getting all excited about the I qoute "flower" in the other one his cappa. That was priceless.

Life can be brilliant sometimes in the simplest of ways

caf-fiene wrote:My Favourite is when your standing behind a LARGE silver shinning 3 group Spaz stacked to the ceiling with coffee cups and a customer walks up looks at the machine then you and asks
"do you make coffee ? " ......... Ummm No this thing is just for decoration!!!

or "can i have a latte with no milk" ?

I walked into the lodge up in the Poconos when I went up for a ski. Saw a decent looking espresso machine behind the bar and asked for a cappa. She says "oh terribly sorry, none of us know how to use it" so had to have a mediocre filter from the Bunn. So that expensive ornament was indeed for decoration.

I went up to a mobile place at Donington Motogp one year and asked for two doppios. They had milk in them. Took them back and the serving wench (greek I think) angrily pointed out that it was a double coffee with a creamy head - so they put cream in it. Sigh.

Ordered an espresso in a Wetherspoons once, but the machine was down so (eager to please) she comes back with (I think) an instant coffee in an espresso cup. Blech! She was nice to me so I was nice back but you do end up in despair sometimes at the training some of these people don't get.

Once I have held a coffee lesson in Warsaw, when I arrived I discovered that the machine was so high that I could not reach the steamer! Even for them the espresso machine was a simple decoration.
Speaking about strange coffees I have to say that in the coffee shops of my Company (Chiaroscuro) we prepare the Cocchino: espresso with strawberry and balsamic vinegar!
http://www.mokaflor-italian-coffee.com/

I love to upset my son's day out when I visit him in London. He drags me into a Nero/$tarbuck clone where the coffee menu covers several volumes. What do you want Dad? Coffee please, He then reads out the list.............. Can you get the barista to clean out the crap from the pf and give me an Americano........ Sit down dad, I'll bring it to you.

canto wrote:Speaking about strange coffees I have to say that in the coffee shops of my Company (Chiaroscuro) we prepare the Cocchino: espresso with strawberry and balsamic vinegar!
http://www.mokaflor-italian-coffee.com/

eww! what the hell is that? How do you prepare it?